The history of Lames
by LordStarrider
Summary: When Harry suddenly starts doubting the goodness of James Potter and the undying love Lily Evans felt for him, Sirius Black decides it's time to tell his godson the story of the most epic couple Hogwarts has ever known. A story about hatred, desires, growing up and the will to keep going and defeat every problem that might cross your path. Brought to you by Sirius Orion Black.
1. The Prologue

'How come she married him?' Harry asked, obviously not happy about the behaviour his father had shown that particular day. Sirius couldn't help but smile noticing how Lily-like Harry could be. He exchanged a look with Remus knowing he thought the exact same thing. 'She hated him!' The men shook their heads in a synchronized way that only the best of friends could do.

'Nah, she didn't,' Sirius said, knowing Evans wasn't one to hate people, even though she was a master at pretending to hate Prongs' guts, stubborn as she always was. He noticed the disbelieving look in his godsons' eyes and decided it was time to do something about that. If there was anyone who had the right to know how great James Potter and Lily Evans were together, it was their son. He would not let Snivellus make Harry think badly of them. James didn't deserve that. Not after being the best friend one could ever hope for. Not after being such an honourable husband. He knew Evans would hunt him until his dead if he didn't clean up Snivellus' mess and one would never want Evans to hunt him. Except for Prongs of course, but his best friend always liked a bit of danger in his life. Sirius himself was rather on the redheads' good side after she once punished him by cutting of his devilishly handsome long dark locks.

'She started going out with him in seventh year,' Remus explained Harry on which Sirius added 'Once James had deflated his head a bit.' Both men couldn't stop grinning thinking about all the times that Evans insulted the size of Prongs' head. That had happened too many times to keep count, though the redhead herself knew exactly how many times James had asked her out, or tried to ask her out. Many times he failed and got beaten up even before he actually asked.

'Look Harry,' Sirius said, being quite serious now. 'I understand that what you saw wasn't your fathers prettiest side.'

'Though he himself would say all of his sides were prettier than anyone else could dream to be,' Remus added and the two men smirked. He would have said that most definitely.

'Why don't you come over? Just step into the fire. No one will notice. Then we Marauders will tell you exactly what made the feisty ginger marry our deer beloved Prongs.' Sirius could see the disapproval in Remus' green eyes, but decided to ignore it. It was important Harry knew the truth about his parents plus The history of Lames, as Sirius liked to call it, was a great story to tell his godson, since he himself was the hero who saved Prongs' pathetic love life.

'I'm not sure if that's such a good idea,' Harry said, though Sirius could almost smell there wasn't much Harry needed to be convinced. He knew the look in those emerald eyes far to well. It was exactly how Evans had watched James from a distance a few months before she finally gave in.

'Ah, where is your sense for a little mischief, Harry James Potter,' he therefor said, grinning at Remus, who was about to protest.

'Minerva will kill you, Padfoot.' Sirius looked at his friend, who clearly didn't like the idea of secretly having Harry over, but he wasn't one to listen.

'But it's old toad Umbridge who is the boss now and I would never miss out on an opportunity at teaching that old hag we won't listen to her pink rubbish. Besides, Minnie loves me. She would never kill her favourite student.' Remus sighed while rolling his eyes, but he knew he would never be able to stop a Sirius Black on a mission and so Harry stepped out of the fire and joined the two men for a typically British cup of tea at Grimmauld Place. Sirius took a sip of his tea, before leaning back in his chair and studied Harry, who clearly was impatiently waiting for him to start telling a tale he had longed to hear ever since he was old enough to realize he missed his real parents, a lot.

'So Harry, are you ready for being told about the heroic rescue of the magnificent smoking hot Sirius Orion Black?' Sirius asked, giving him a wink.

'Sirius, I have no clue what happened to your memories while spending twelve years in Azkaban, but I haven't got the faintest idea what you're talking about and I should, since I was there,' Remus interrupted. Sirius waved his protests away.

'Guess you just have to wait and listen as well, Moony. Just like Harry,' he said happily before becoming dead serious while slowly folding his hands. 'It began in our sixth year on a cold Friday evening in February, when your mum entered the common room way too happy compared to her usual state of being after a normal school day,' Sirius told Harry, who bended a little towards him.

'Did it?' Remus asked, but immediately got shushed by both Harry and Sirius himself.

'Yeah, it definitely did.'


	2. 1,1 A Date

"At half past nine Lily Evans finally entered the common room hidden into her sweater to shield herself from the February cold, but feeling warm inside nevertheless. On her face a broad smile, something that had been rare the past few months. Peter had blamed the lack of food she seemed to consume, James the lack of time she spent in his company and Sirius the lack of humour there was behind her pretty face. As usual Remus had some smart theory none of the other boys were interested in, since it contained James' greatest enemy: Severus Snape. Remus had given up convincing them after two weeks and figured his friends were hopeless.

'Oi Evans, why do you look so extremely happy?' James asked, immediately consumed by her presence. 'Don't you think she looks more content than she has seemed for weeks, Padfoot?' He then said, forcing Sirius to look up from his muggle motorbike magazine at the girl that was now rolling her eyes at his best friend.

'I don't know mate. Maybe she's just happy to see you?' He grinned at first, expecting an outburst from the red head, but frowned when his words for a change didn't seem to affect her, at all. She folded her arms like she always did, but in the same time she smiled as if nothing could ever steal her good mood away. In fact, it seemed as if she looked down on the boys and Sirius, arrogant and proud from the day he was born, didn't like this new behaviour of Evans. James on the other hand didn't seem to mind her sudden change of behaviour towards them and just enjoyed the fact she hadn't hexed him, yet.

'So while you're here anyway I wanted to ask if you-'

'I already have a date for this Hogsmeade weekend, Potter,' she interrupted James looking quite content with herself. All four boys gasped. Even Remus lost his interest for the heavy book he was reading and stared at the girl.

'A date? You?' Sirius asked sceptically. Everyone knew Lily Evans wasn't the dating type. The first five years she spent too much time with her friends Mary and Marlene, or she was in the company of Severus Snape. Then The Incident happened and from then on she barely even looked at the boys that paid attention to her. She was too caught up with studying and beating everyone at every single test to actually live. Sirius got all the inside information from Marlene McKinnon, who was, if one asked Sirius Black, definitely the coolest girl at Hogwarts.

'You have a date?' James asked pretending to be just interested, though his friends knew better. The usual mischievous glint wasn't there and when it wasn't, James Potter was unhappy about something. It rarely happened, but when it did, Sirius always noticed its absence. In general it was the moment to start worrying about James.

'With someone else than Prongs? Why?' Peter was obviously completely confused. Sirius knew that in his eyes Sirius himself and James were perfect. A girl would be crazy to date someone else if she could date one of the two most popular boys in school, but Evans always had been the only girl to say no to James.

'Because I don't date arrogant toerags, Peter. I thought you got that by now,' she answered patiently. It was incredible how patient that girl was with everyone but James. She gave the boys a content smile before walking to the stairs that led to the girls' dormitory. Stairs that Sirius and James still had to mislead somehow. It had been on their big "Marauder to do list" for four years now. The girls shouldn't be allowed to have a place they were save from Marauder pranks. They had covered almost every place in the castle. Even the Ravenclaw common room! They just had to get up there. Sirius was about to bring up the topic, not interested at all in Evans' whereabouts, when James called after her.

'Who is the lucky guy?' The redhead seemed to be in doubt for a second, but then opened her mouth anyway. She probably just wanted to be the one to brag for once, even though she didn't need it to impress poor Prongs.

'Not that it's any of your business, but it's Fabian Prewett.' Both James and Peter stared at her in shock.

'The head boy? But he's a seventh year! He's way too old for you. And he doesn't even know the difference between a Bludger and a Quaffle! Plus his eyes are dull and he walks funny.' Remus sighed and threw his book at James to shut him up. Sirius wasn't surprised about his reaction. Both him and Remus knew he would never be able to act long like he was cool with it and they better made sure he shut up before he would say something really really stupid, something that would piss off Evans for sure. Sirius and Remus knew she could be very dangerous when one spoiled her good mood.

'So? At least he's not an egoistic dickhead that has so much arrogance in his huge airhead that he doesn't understand the meaning of the word "no".' The door slammed shut behind her tiny figure leaving the four boys flabbergasted in their seats at the window.

'So that's why he always wanted to talk to Lily after the meetings. He liked her,' Remus eventually said not noticing the ears of James were growing redder and redder by the second.

'And you couldn't have warned me?' he almost screamed. The other three lifted their eyebrows. Everyone knew it had been just a matter of time before Lily Evans decided that she was a normal girl that should date like all the other girls and James couldn't claim her. She was an independent girl, a true feminist it seemed, something Sirius quite admired as long as it wasn't used against him.

'James, Lily isn't some price you can claim. If she likes Fabian there isn't much you can do about it,' Remus explained. Both him, Sirius himself and Peter looked at James and expected some stupid comment, but instead he sighed deeply and hid his head in his hands. He looked downright miserable.

'I know all right! I just wished she understood I don't ignore her rejections because I want to be annoying or want to look stupid!' Sirius looked at his best friend in a state of confusedness.

'Mate, then why do you keep asking the poor girl out in the most ridiculous ways?' It was silent for a long time until James emptied his throat and stood up.

'I don't know. I'm going to bed.' And with that he left the common room, leaving his friends clueless."

'Tell me again why it started with that particular evening, Padfoot?' Remus asked Sirius sceptically. 'I mean, that happened long before they started dating.' Harry didn't understand his godfather either. Probably Askaban did clouded Sirius' memories, but he didn't want to prevent him from telling about his parents as much as possible. Not after having to live with the lies of his uncle and aunt for almost eleven years. He wanted to know more about his parents. Actually he just wanted to know everything about them. His dad still sounded a bit like a jerk and his mum decently couldn't stand him, but that only made him more curious about what happened.

'Ah my friends, don't you see? That was the very moment our beloved Prongs decided he didn't just like pestering Lily Evans. No he liked hér. Truly madly liked her and he wanted to get rid of these scary feelings before he became too girly. Plus, sweet little miss Evans finally started letting people in again. This was the beginning of Lames and you're a fool if you don't see that.'


	3. 1,2 A Date

"'I can't take this. I need to get over her, if it's the last thing I do.' It was a cloudy day. February the fourteenth to be exact and the four boys were sitting on a bench across the Three Broomsticks. The place was crowded since they had pranked the fluffy pink teashop that every single normal person gave the urge to throw up, aka Madam Puddifoot's. They got free butterbeers from Rosemerta for their great way to chase costumers out of that horrific place towards their favourite pub and were enjoying them in the drizzle where they didn't feel like squashed canned Flobberworm mucus as they would inside the pub.

'I've told you that for years, Prongs.' Sirius eyed his best friend from behind his bottle. 'Enough birds in this big grey cloudy British sky. Even some I haven't shagged myself,' he said with a wink on which Remus sighed deeply.

'About that, don't you have a date? You usually have. Especially on Valentines Day.' Sirius wanted to tell him that he wasn't really into some sappy romance and preferred pranking today, but James started talking again. Or moaning, that was more suitable. Maybe Sirius should set him up with Moaning Myrtle after all. They both moaned and wore glasses. It seemed perfect. He should remember that for his next prank. James probably wouldn't appreciate it, but at least it would be hilarious. He was sure Remus and Peter would laugh their asses off.

'I should have had a date. I mean, we're Gods! Every girl wants to date us and now Fabian Prewett, not even handsome head boy Prewett, has one with Lily bloody Evans and we're sitting here like a bunch of losers.' He threw his empty bottle with great violence towards the trashcan on the other side of the road. It fell straight in. Sirius would have been impressed, but everyone knew James Potter was one of the best chasers Hogwarts had seen in a while.

'Oh don't be such a whiner, Prongs. We had a great time five minutes ago and now that you've seen Evans with that Prewett you're being a total baby. Just go out there and get yourself a lonely girl to snog for Merlins sake!' he therefor said on which Peter and Remus frowned. They clearly didn't agree with that.

'Or you could make Fabian look like a total prat in front of Evans. You know, prank him,' Peter offered, which made James laugh, while Sirius shove Peters butterbeer in his mouth to shut him up.

'That would only make the feisty redhead angry.'

'But it would be hilarious,' James said thoughtful. The three boys grinned, though Remus shook his head in disapproval. Sirius knew he, as usual, had very different ideas about what James should do and he was probably right, but Sirius had always been wrong in every single way and that seemed to work out, if you didn't count all the times his parents used nasty curses on him. Besides, that was behind him now. He wasn't planning on going back home anytime soon. He would figure something out. He had stayed with Fleamont and Euphemia Potter the last weeks of the summer break and during Christmas they had stayed with Remus at Hogwarts. He didn't know what was going to happen next summer. Maybe he could contact his uncle Alphard or his cousin Andromeda. They were the normal ones in the family.

'James, if you go in there right now she will hate you even more. Even Pads' option is a better one than making yourself look like an even bigger prat than Fabian by pranking him. Don't you see? She would feel sorry for him and hate you. It's only going to get you into more trouble.' Remus' voice woke Sirius from his stream of thoughts about is family and future. It took him a few deep breathes to realise James had stood up and was about to walk straight into the Three Broomsticks to make a fool of himself once again.

'Mate, Moony is right. I think you have to accept that she's with Fabian right now,' he spoke. Everyone stared at him in shock. Okay, so maybe Sirius usually wasn't the one to stop James from pranking, but he knew that the whole Evans thing apparently was hurting him in some way and James was his best friend after all. He didn't want him to suffer. 'I can say smart things too sometimes, you know. You don't have to look like you've seen a ghost. I have brains. I just dislike using them for being reasonable.'

'Right…' James mumbled and sat down next to him again. 'Then what do I do now?' Remus opened his mouth but then closed it again. He did this a few times making him look extremely adorable, but dumb in the same time.

'Just get it out of the way, Moony,' Peter eventually cut in.

'Right, so there are two options. One, you stop acting like a jerk in front of Lily Evans. You are a great person, James. You just don't show it to anyone. Except for us and your parents of course.' The three others looked at him in disbelief. James was always awesome. Maybe a bit of an idiot sometimes, but awesome nevertheless. Remus Lupin was once again talking smart rubbish none of them understood. Apparently he noticed none of them understood what he was talking about, because he sighed deeply once again and continued with the second option. 'Or two, you start going out with other girls and get over her. Not just to snog or shag them, like Sirius said, but to actually start liking someone who isn't Lily Evans.' That was something that made James furrow his brow while having a deep thought.

'You mean dating someone else than Evans? Really dating? Not just snogging, using or showing off or something?' He eventually asked. Sirius couldn't help but wonder if his best friend was just stupid or if he really deeply cared about the redhead. They used to tease James when he protected her or made a fool of himself again, but things were changing. James had become more serious, their pranks had become different, aimed at truly evil people like Mulciber and Avery from Slytherin house and sometimes it felt like a war was going on inside the school. And it wasn't just a prank war, no, everyone was picking a side. Either the good one, or Voldemorts side.

'Yeah,' Remus said slowly. He locked eyes with Sirius who shrugged his shoulders not knowing how to help his best friend in this very moment. Convincing Evans she should go on a date with James would be insanely mad. They would end up dead for sure, probably after losing their genitals. It wasn't that Sirius was afraid of Lily Evans, but she could be really scary.

'Okay, I could do that. I mean, if Evans can, why wouldn't I?' James said and sat straight up while stretching his Quidditch muscles. 'There must be a nice, smart, pretty, funny, brave, strong girl here somewhere who is not Evans and hasn't shagged Padfoot. And when I find her, I will ask her out and she will say yes.' Remus looked worried, but Sirius decided it was not the time to worry. James looked much better and that was something they should celebrate.

'I'm in mate. Let's find some hot chicks to keep us company tonight. What about you, Peter? Remus?' Sirius asked, standing up in a cheery way. Peter mumbled something that sounded like "nah", but Remus shook his head.

'I think I'm heading back to the castle. There is a large book waiting for my attention over there plus some fine smelling chocolate that awaits my stomach to welcome him.' He grinned wickedly. 'You go have fun with your fangirls.'"


	4. 1,3 A Date

"And so Sirius and James entered the way too crowdie Three Broomsticks looking for girls who weren't on a date with their boring boyfriend. Of course Sirius usually didn't mind them having a boyfriend, 'cause it wasn't his fault the girls liked him better, but now he had James with him who desperately needed a nice trustworthy girl who could wow him, so that Evans got out of his head. This plan already showed some problems though, mainly because the redhead was in the same building talking to her date.  
Sirius grabbed James' wrist and dragged him towards the bar where Madam Rosmerta served her customers with slightly pink cheeks from the heat. Among the customers were two girls Sirius knew all to well. Mostly because one of them, the gorgeous brunette with at least twenty red roses in her hand called Jazzy, was one of his projects. The other one was Elive, her best friend, and, what made Sirius feel like he just won the jackpot, a redhead. Well, Elive didn't have the beautiful long deep red locks Evans was blessed with. It was more like some weird red-blonde shade, but it would do. Besides, she was a Ravenclaw and Sirius knew she liked Quidditch, though she hadn't made it into the Ravenclaw team.  
Sirius looked around one more time to see if he could find a better offer, but decided that the others wouldn't even stand a chance. Plus, he saw that James was going to get miserable again if he didn't do something about it anytime soon. Elive and Jazzy it was.  
'Hey Jazzy, what is a gorgeous looking girl like yourself doing without a date on Valentine's Day?' He asked casually. He saw James first looked at Jazzy, then frowned and focussed his attention at Elive with a bit more interest. Well, that was going just great, wasn't it?  
'I could say the same about you,' Jazzy answered with a voice sweet as honey. She wasn't that sweet though. Maybe to Elive, but she liked to manipulate the rest of he world for some reason. It was a hobby of hers, which made her interesting enough to be his project for more or less a month. Not much longer.  
'I wouldn't call Sirius a girl,' James suddenly said, cutting in. 'Gorgeous looking, yes, but a girl, nah.' Jazzy clearly didn't appreciated James ruining her ways to flirt with Sirius, but Sirius himself snorted. Even better, Elive had to giggle. That meant she had James' humour. Another thing Evans lacked. No humour and no Quidditch. Sometimes he wondered how James, funny, sportive James, could be so fond of Evans, but sadly even Sirius had to admit Evans could be quite likable. Especially when she was insulting mean Slytherins, defending herself and others. Of course her insults were funny too when she used them for Prongs, but Sirius liked it better when those awful guys were her victims instead of his best friend. Showing them no one hurt someone Lily Evans cared about without experiencing the horrible consequences.  
Great, now Sirius was analysing the redhead. He better paid attention to Jazzy before someone noticed he was just here to help Prongs out. Plus, it would be nice if he could get that Jazzy alone in some quiet alley sometime soon. Very nice.  
'Does anyone of you want to drink anything?' he decided to ask the two ladies and James, who was about to get into a discussion with Jazzy, something that probably wouldn't end well. James didn't like Slytherins, in general. Sirius knew not all of them were truly evil, like Jazzy –she was just a slutty slightly arrogant girl, not a soon to be death eater- but Sirius understood why James was being extremely careful. Hating all Slytherins was definitely the easiest way to avoid possible Death eaters.  
Sirius took their orders and pushed himself a way through the crowd towards Madam Rosmerta. There he ended up next to Lily Evans, who bended towards Rosmerta to order something. Sirius couldn't help but notice she had outdone herself. She clearly put some effort in the date, but judging from the fact she was paying her own drink, Prewett hadn't. In some way it made Sirius mad. The guy was lucky Evans said yes to him and he clearly wasn't even grateful enough to act like a gentleman for her. He was about to think it was a good thing James hadn't come with him, when he appeared on his left side.  
'Why is Evans paying her own drinks, while she definitely is worth serving?' he sneered. Sirius shrugged his shoulders as in saying they should mind their own business. They had two pretty girls waiting for them. It was Evans' problem. Not theirs, but James was already pushing the redhead out of the way and gave some money to Rosmerta before she could.  
'Potter, what for the love of God do you think you are doing?' Oh Merlin, she was clearly pissed. She always was when she started using the word "God". In her fury she forgot no one here in the wizarding world used the word "God". The whole plan was about not interfering and now James had done just that. Maybe Sirius could sneak out and disappear in the crowd.  
'Relax Evans, it's just… you definitely deserve a guy paying your drinks.' He grabbed the glass of tea that was standing on the bar and carefully handed it to a frowning, confused looking Evans.  
'But I don't want you to buy my drinks,' she complained and took a quick glance at Prewett, who wasn't paying attention to her, at all.  
'Just imagine it was him, okay? Then I won't hit him in his arrogant lazy face and you get to continue your date.' Uh oh. Now she was definitely going to curse him for insulting her "boyfriend". Sirius was one hundred percent sure. He closed his eyes, but nothing came. No screaming, no slapping sounds, just silence. And silence. And even more silence  
'Well…' Evans began eventually. She seemed to hesitate. That definitely was something new.  
'I really can't-'  
'Oh shut it Evans,' James cut in. 'Look at yourself. You are doing every single straight guy in this pub a favour right now. The least someone can do is buying you a drink. You deserve someone who does that.' He actually did it. He had made Lily Evans speechless. Nervously the girl bit her lip and let her eyes dance between the cup of tea and Prongs slightly annoyed face. Sirius knew he wanted to bring hell upon Prewett so bad right now. It was truly a miracle he hadn't just walked over to the assface to show him some manners.  
'Fine. But I can't imagine it was him who bought me a drink or complemented me, sort off.' She inhaled deeply. 'Thank you.' Wait, did she really just say thank you to hís Prongs? Did Fabian brainwash her or something?  
'It's nice to know you can't forget me, Evans.' Ah there was the old Prongs again. Bugger. Now he screwed up again. The redhead dropped dead instead of walking back towards her date and then- then she smiled towards the boy. She gave Prongs a fucking smile just as he decided he had to forget her and move on. Of course she did. She was Lily Evans and even though she didn't even noticed herself, she was hanging on to James Potter. She didn't even mean to probably. She didn't even try. It was like it was supposed to be that way, even though she usually disliked him.  
'I can't believe that ashole didn't get her a drink, can you?' Sirius awoke from his trans and looked up at his best mate. He suddenly wondered if Elive was a good idea after all, but assumed he better discussed that with Moony later on. He would know what to do about this newfound situation.  
'No mate, I can't. Not at all. Let's get Jazzy and Elive their drinks.' James nodded, ordered and paid the drinks without saying much. Sirius wondered if he was thinking and analysing as well. He must have seen Evans sweet smile as well. It must have done something to him, since he knew Evans could give Prongs more butterflies than anyone by just walking past him. They needed a secret Marauders meeting soon. And discussing Lily Evans would be on their priority list. Even though they had already done that today. It was important to Prongs, that was one thing Sirius knew for sure and that made it important to all of them. They were the Marauders after all. Best friends till the day they died."


	5. 1,4 A Date

"It felt a bit like the good old times where James and Sirius were each other's wingmen and always scored the hottest girls. They hadn't done that yet this year, mostly because James had been obsessed with Quidditch, being the captain and all. Plus he only had eyes for Lily Evans it seemed, but Sirius noticed he was really trying this time. Apparently Evans' sweet smile hadn't made James change his mind just yet. They were enjoying their drinks while talking furiously about Quidditch. Well, James and Elive were talking mostly. Sirius knew Jazzy was looking for something entirely different and he didn't mind that, at all.

'You're in the Gryffindor team too right?' Elive suddenly asked Sirius. He only had eyes for Jazzy, Elive was James', but he decided answering her question wouldn't cause any trouble.

'Yeah, apparently James thought I was good enough to make it to the team as a Beater.' He felt Jazzy's hand stroking his leg, which made him shudder under her touch. They had picked the right two girls for today. That was for sure. He saw James rolling his eyes. It was probably because Jazzy was a Slytherin, he thought. He couldn't recall James had done that before when they were on a hunt for girls. Usually he smirked when Sirius had got a hold of a beautiful girl like Jazzy.

'Oh you really should show me your beating skills soon.' Sirius turned towards her and bowed forward to whisper in her ear. She was just too easy. A month would be much too long, he decided. He barely had to do anything to get her exactly where he liked her. It was almost getting boring. Almost. Luckily she was wearing a short skirt and a revealing blouse, showing him how beautiful she was. Otherwise he would have lost his interest by now.

'How soon did you have in mind?' Someone behind him snorted, which made James and laugh. Elive and Jazzy didn't look too happy though.

'Can you please do that sooner instead of later. Remus and me have rounds tonight, since I asked Ravenclaw to swap. They first had planned us on the fourth, but I had something else that night. Point is, I really don't like opening classrooms and stuff to find shagging people and so does Remus.' Evans, again. This time she was carrying two empty bottles. Probably Prewetts, since she had a cup of tea. Not a bottle. Clearly James thought her responding to Sirius flirting with Jazzy was hilarious. Oh now Sirius was definitely going to prank him soon. No one laughed at Sirius Orion Black without getting pranked afterwards.

'Whatever you wish, miss Evans. I wouldn't want to scar Moony for life, now, wouldn't I.' Jazzy seemed quite offended and it was clear Elive didn't appreciate the fact James' obsession was now talking to them, again. Evans could see that too, cause she lifted her eyebrows at the girls and put down the bottles on the bar.

'Well enjoy your day. And thanks again, Potter.' She quickly walked back to Prewett, who was waiting for her at the door. He possessively wrapped his arm around her waist and they disappeared through the door. Sirius exchanged a slightly annoyed look with James. Prewett hadn't made himself popular. He was a great guy, but he clearly didn't know how to treat his girl. Even Sirius was doing a better job at that and he broke their hearts over and over again.

'Can you please do that sooner instead of later. Remus and me have rounds tonight,' Jazzy copied Evans with a silly face. Elive giggled again, but both boys didn't even smile a little. Their minds were only thinking of one thing now that Evans had disappeared. The fourth had been a full moon, a good one. They were getting better at being friends to a werewolf every time it was a full moon. Sometimes Remus had bad nights, but it was going so much better now they kept him company, played with him and discovered the forbidden forest. It had been an amazing night. They just hadn't thought of the fact Remus had to make sure he didn't have rounds on full moon, but apparently Evans had been helpful with that. Did she know? Remus hadn't told her, Sirius was sure of that. Otherwise he, James and Peter would know. They told each other everything. Maybe it was just a coincidence, but both Sirius and James decided they should keep an eye on Evans.

'You know, we should go too,' Jazzy said stroking his arm this time. Sirius nodded and emptied his bottle in his throat. James lifted Elive's coat from her seat and helped her in it. The four left the Three Broomsticks after saying goodbye to Madam Rosmerta and walked through the rain back to the castle. Sirius noticed Elive had guided James' attention back to her and her only by talking about Quidditch again. It was the only thing that always worked on James. Sirius had seen girls do that way too often. The funny thing was he could talk to the boy about almost everything without loosing his attention. Pranks, magic, politics, girls, problems, everything. But that was probably why the two were best friends together with Remus and Peter.

'You know, we should leave them alone. I think Elive would like that. And judging on the look on James' face, she can give him much more than that prudish Evans would ever give him, don't you think?' Sirius frowned, but figured it wouldn't matter if they would leave James alone with Elive or not. James could take care of himself and Elive quite well.

'You sure this is about Elive and James?' he whispered back. Jazzy giggled and pushed him towards the nearest broom closet. Well, he was planning on spending a day with the boys and pranking a lot, but they had done that already and he didn't mind having to spend time with Jazzy in a tiny little room where no one would look for them. Actually he was having a great day. He just hoped James was too. He had a hard time reading the boy at the moment, but frankly it wasn't really his problem. He had found him a distraction from Evans and that had been his mission. Besides, he had no time for concerns, since a soft pair of lips was occupying his. He grinned and pushed the girl roughly against the wall.

'So, about my beating skills…' Oh, how Sirius loved Valentine's Day."

'Wait, so my mum dated some guy named Fabian Prewett and my dad some girl named Elive? But how on earth did this help them end up together?' Harry asked Sirius, who smiled. Sometimes it was like no one understood him. Yeah, he definitely missed Prongs, but talking about him to Harry helped a lot. Besides the story about "Lames" was a great one. He noticed even Remus was enjoying it, since his eyes were dreamy, thinking of their glory days.

'Fabian Prewett, youngest brother of Molly. He died during the war. And Elive Edgecombe, who works for the Ministry of Magic nowadays.' He explained to Harry who furrowed his brow hearing those names. 'Fabian really was a nice guy though. He just… well let's say he and your mum weren't a great combination. And he really didn't know how to date girls.' Remus had to laugh loudly, which made Harry even more curious about how the story would continue. Something Sirius didn't found very strange and he was happy to tell his godson more. They should have been able to tell him this many years ago, but fate never exactly did what you wanted it to do. Well, at least most times it didn't. After all, fate had brought love and friendship to his life, something one should never forget.


	6. 2,1 The Marauder Tower

"Sirius was quite certain it was past twelve O'clock when the door of their dormitory finally opened and the last member of their gang entered their Marauder tower. A smile crept up his face as he hid himself underneath the blanket. He pointed his ears, listening to the soft sounds his roommate made, while brushing his teeth and putting on his pyjamas. It took way too long. He had already waited for hours. Strange enough usually Sirius was the one who stayed up too late, but he got bored of Jazzy and ditched her some time ago.

He almost gave up his hiding place, figuring the surprise wasn't worth the waiting, when the red curtains moved. Without noticing someone was already in his bed, Remus stepped into it. He sighed relaxed, but this feeling of comfort and peace only lasted for one second.

'Merlins pants, Padfoot, what are you doing in my bed?' he hissed, while trying to get away from Sirius and thereby almost falling on the ground. Sirius caught his arm just in time, to pull him back, so that he could use him as a pillow. It wasn't something he hadn't done before, but Remus just didn't expect him to be here in this very moment. He expected him to be fast asleep, so that he could reminisce on his time with the slutty Slytherin in his dreams. But Sirius didn't have time to dream. He needed to talk to Remus.

'Moony Swoony Dwoony, I need you,' he desperately said, looking at the boy opening the widest eyes he could produce in this very moment. He batted his eyelashes, hoping his friend wouldn't push him on the ground. He sometimes did that, but apparently Remus couldn't resist the curiosity Sirius awakened. He sighed once again, this time more out of annoyance than comfort and leaned with his head against his pillow.

'Fine, what's up?' he whispered on which Sirius smiled. Victory was his.

'Well, something strange happened today after you and Pete left.' He could see the sceptical look in Remus' eyes. He didn't take him serious and since his name was Sirius and therefor he should always be taken seriously, he didn't like that at all. He knew he could be quite the drama queen, but this time he actually for once was very serious. It was about Prongs' wellbeing after all and he was quite sure only Remus had the right answer. He might have ignored Remus' good advice for the past five years, but now he desperately wanted it.

'Oh, you didn't get "it" up?' Sirius was shocked. How could Remus think this was about something like that? How could he even think that at all? It didn't matter his voice sounded sarcastic. Even then it wasn't a thing one should say to Sirius Black.

'Bloody hell, no, Moony! Who do you even think you're talking to?' Remus smiled sweetly, which made Sirius curse under his breath. Damn, he probably wanted him to react that way. 'Oh stop smiling, child of the devil. I am actually trying to have a normal conversation here for once.' Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius and closed his eyes. He was probably tired. Sirius hoped he wouldn't fall asleep in the middle of the story.

'Okay, I'll listen, Paddie. Tell me, what's wrong?'

'Well, if you insist, you know we were on a mission to make Prongs forget Evans right?' He asked, relaxing in Remus' arms. He liked having friends who didn't mind hugging him the way his mum and dad did. The boy nodded and so Sirius continued his story. 'Well, he was actually doing great. With this girl named Elive, from Ravenclaw. Do you know her?'

'Yes, I do. She likes reading as well I think. I see her in the library quite often reading books about the more girly stuff. Mostly pink and purple books if I'm correct.' Sirius stared at Remus for a few seconds. He didn't know he actually watched other people while being in the library. Actually that was quite smart. Mostly people in the library were to busy reading or studying that they didn't even notice you observing them. Only Evans did when it was Prongs who was the one staring at him, of course. Now Sirius knew how Remus got most of the information they needed to prank the geeks the past five years! Maybe Sirius should go to the library more often. Wait, no. He was Sirius Black. He couldn't go to the library. But it was quite clever of Remus. He had to admit that.

'Well that was going great, but we went to get some drinks and kinda saw Evans there and it seemed she was buying her own drinks, so Prongs bought her a drink instead of Prewett, saying she deserved it. At first she was planning on getting mad, but then she didn't say anything and eventually she even thanked him and give him a smile. A smile, Remus! And later on she even made a joke -it wasn't funny though- and thanked him again. It was weird, extremely weird. I really thought she was going to curse him or something. That would have been a normal reaction. Well, for redhead Evans. Other girls rather do other things to our Prongs, if you know what I mean.' Remus rolled his eyes at him. It was his usual reaction when Sirius mentioned anything that was related to snogging or shagging. It was insanely prudish and adorable, but Sirius wasn't going to say that out loud.

'I actually already knew that happened. Lily told me.' Sirius mouth dropped as he stared at Remus. She told him? Why would she do that? He knew Remus and Lily actually were great friends. Especially since they became prefects together, but he hadn't expect her to talk about this to anyone. Well, maybe Mary since that was her best friend, but besides that…

'She did?' suddenly a head appeared through the opening of the curtains surrounding the bed. Well, it seemed James wasn't a sleep as well. Sirius couldn't help but feel slightly awkward. He had been discussing the love life of his best mate with his other best mate and now it seemed that that best mate had heard everything he had said. James climbed on the bed as well, almost pushing Sirius overboard. He figured it was more important James didn't know they were discussing him than the fact he almost got pushed out of Remus bed. If anyone had the right to be in Remus bed it was Sirius obviously.

'And did you know Jazzy's full name is Jazlynn? She hates it though, that's why she calls herself Jazzy. She was really interesting, for one day.' James lifted his eyebrows at him. Well, it was worth the try.

'So everyone who was too slow to get she's a slut will know now too, because Jazzy sounds like some bad stripper name or something?' Remus snorted and patted James on the shoulder. Wow, he and Evans really liked making fun of Sirius and his project today, didn't they? And it seemed even Remus enjoyed them doing that. He should have said something to shut them up, but frankly it was a good one, so he couldn't think of anything at the moment. He figured the prank he planned for James just had to be epic. 'But did she really tell you?' James added enthusiastically moving up and down, making the bed creak dangerously. Poor bed.

'Yeah she did. Why don't you just join us, James? It's not like MY bed isn't full enough or something,' Remus said, definitely being sarcastic again. James ignored the tone of his voice, though. He kept hopping up and down like some total wanker. Apparently they were having a Marauder night tonight, if you counted Peters snoring as attendance of the fourth member of their gang, naturally."


	7. 2,2 The Marauder Tower

"'Thank you, Moony. What did she say about me?' James replied instead of leaving the poor bed alone. Oh Merlin, he was definitely walking the wrong path again. Well, unless this meant Lily Evans wasn't out of his reach after all, but it was hard to believe that was the case. Lily Evans would always be Lily Evans. No one could change that and Sirius didn't think she had ever despised someone more than James. It was not like Sirius didn't want the girl to fall in love with his best friend. He was quite certain they would make a great couple, if she would give it a chance. James was after al an amazing person. The problem was, that the redhead was just as stubborn as James. And Sirius for that matter.

'Not much, but she was upset about a fight between her and Fabian. She gave me a short version of what happened in the Three Broomsticks to explain what the fight was about.' James' dorky smile got broader by the second as he messed up his hair even more in pure excitement, Remus queue to spoil the poor bloke's happiness. 'And they made up, James. He apologised and explained he isn't very good at these things. Said to her he never liked a girl more than he likes her. Oh and he gave her a very pretty notebook with sweet quotes on some pages.' The dark haired boy huffed, clearly not impressed by the gift or Fabians excuses. He folded his arms and stared at some red spot behind Remus and Sirius, as if he didn't want to look at his friends.

'I really don't get her. He was a bigger assface than I usually am, but still he gets make up kisses and I get screaming and nasty curses I don't even know existed.' Sirius bit his lip. He really wanted to help James, but he just didn't know how. Usually he just made fun of James and told him to go snog a pretty girl, but frankly he just couldn't this time. He already was afraid that Evans-smile had done something to his best friend and it seemed that was exactly what happened even though he had pretended nothing was wrong the whole evening. Apparently James Potter was good at that. Sirius himself was a drama queen most of the time and Remus was a terrible liar when it came down to lying to the three other boys. James usually didn't have anything to complain about, the perfect life. Or at least it seemed as if his life was perfect. He was rich and spoiled. He loved himself and his life and didn't fear anything. It was a mask though. It was all just a mask.

'Mate, I know you love her emerald green bright eyes, but I really think they aren't working quite right. She just won't see how great you are.' Sirius moved over to James with great effort. The bed creaked again and he wondered if it was going to collapse. 'I know for some reason you want her, but there are hundreds of girls that are seeing every perfect detail of you.' He wrapped his arms around his best friend and hugged him tightly.

'You really are a dog, Sirius. With all that need for petting and attention,' Remus said smiling at the two of them. 'But he is right, James. She has seen the worst of you and she isn't one to just forget that. I disagree with the whole thing about her eyes though. I think she sees those amazing qualities of yours just fine. I actually know she does.' James looked up from the comforting hug of his best friend, on which Sirius went back to his original position. After all he didn't think de bed quite liked him hugging James, judging from its protesting sounds.

'How do you mean?' Remus seemed to have doubts to tell James the truth, but after Sirius' nods, de boy concluded he better could just tell everything. They were finally listening to him after all.

'I don't know if you noticed, but Lily has this amazing quality to see the good sides of literally everything. It wouldn't surprise me if she could write a complete essay of the good qualities of Mulciber.' Both James and Sirius looked as if they were getting sick and had to throw up. It was true though. Lily Evans sometimes defended the most disgusting people, just because it was the right thing to do. Not because they deserved it, if you asked Sirius. 'The problem is that you were a dick to her for five years, James. She loved Severus Snape as we love each other; he was her best friend as Sirius is yours. She knew him as someone else, someone who would never hurt her. Yes, he eventually did, he snapped after all those things you did to him, but that isn't the point here. You two laughed at her, when she tried to explain to you what was wrong with what you did. Figured you could just hurt her, not notice you did and ask her out again in the most humiliating ways as if she is some game to you instead of a person.'

The whole room got silent for a few minutes, letting sink in what Remus just said. Only Peters snoring was disturbing the thoughts drifting through the space. Sirius couldn't help but worry about James' wellbeing. He knew it was never James intention to hurt Lily Evans. He was just jealous that someone like Snivellus was able to make her care about him and he wasn't. Besides, James had been raised thinking all Slytherins were bad and the first thing Snivellus said was that he wanted to become one, insulting the house James had been fond of for many years, since his parents were Gryffindors too. It was even said Fleamont Potter had a lion as a Patronus, but Sirius hadn't seen it yet. It was definitely one of the most awesome Patronuses ever, though.

'Hey, do you think Peters Patronus would be a giant rat? I mean, it can't be the normal size right? And it's pretty obvious it would be a rat since he is a rat,' Sirius suddenly wondered out loud. James lifted his eyebrows at him and Remus seemed confused.

'I have no idea, Padfoot. Why are you even talking about this in the first place? I thought we were talking about Lily, in a good not gossiping way of course.' Sirius shrugged his shoulders. He was one of those people who didn't like waiting 'till someone said something. Besides, Evans wasn't that interesting and maybe his ideas would cheer up James, who was thinking way too long. He never thought that long. James was more like the person who would try a thousand things until something worked. Remus was the one who always thought for days before he came with a solution.

'I never meant to hurt her. I just, how can she love Snivellus the way I love Sirius? That's just… She's perfect. He doesn't deserve that. With his dark arts and awful friends. He called her the M-word! He hurt her much more without a reason. She was always way too kind for his sorry ass.' He clenched his fists, turning his knuckles as white as the sheets. Sirius shook his head.

'As Moony said, maybe he was different before Hogwarts, before he started using the dark arts or something?' It was hard to believe Snivellus Snape hadn't been a creep since he was born, but if it could help James convince Evans… 'Why don't you ask her and actually listen to her?' His friends were shocked. It was again something quite reasonable.

'You know what? Maybe I will. But first she has to find out for herself Prewett isn't her type. Besides, I still have a date with Elive. If she thinks I am not interested in her anymore, maybe she would actually talk to me without looking disgusted.' A satisfied grin spread across James' face, making Sirius content as well. That wasn't a bad plan at all. Which made sense: the Marauders never made bad plans."


	8. 2,3 The Marauder Tower

'So they finally decided to listen to you?' Harry asked laughing about the idiocy of his own father. He now understood why his godfather and former professor were friends with James Potter. He may have been a prat, but it seemed he was a good person after all. Besides, he had been a child like Harry was right now. Sirius couldn't help but feel relieved. He had been afraid Snivellus damage would be permanent.

'Well, sort off. It was one of the good days and definitely a step in the right direction. However, your dad and Sirius would never really change. Which was a good thing, they made the world laugh when no one else could. Sometimes the Weasley twins remind me of them, of us.' Sirius nodded in agreement. Those two Weasley fellows, Fred and George, were good guys. He was glad they had found their map, which they eventually gave to the rightful owner, Harry.

'It sounds amazing, much like how it used to be in our dorm. Before people started thinking I am a liar.' Even though Harry did his very best to sound like he didn't care, Sirius knew the sad glimmer in those emerald eyes far too well. Since sixth year, James always noticed when those green eyes betrayed how Lily Evans truly felt and therefor Sirius was now an expert at reading them.

'We must always remember and treasure the good days when going through the bad. Those good days are what matters and they will always return to us, no matter what, no matter how long it seems to take, Harry. Never forget that.' Remus chuckled hearing Sirius repeat the very same words Lily once told the two gentlemen, when things seemed worse than ever. 'Speaking of good days, that evening wasn't over yet,' Sirius added before someone interrupted him again and continued the story.

"'So, now this is all settled, do you know what we should do?' Sirius asked, glad his best friend seemed to have found his mischievous glint back in his eyes. Remus folded his hands together and looked up at the sky as if he was praying.

'Please, Merlin, Lord, let him say sleep. Let him say sleep. I'll do anything if he says that.' James snorted, which made it impossible for Remus to keep the serious look on his face, bursting into laughter less than a second later than the raven-haired boy. Sirius applauded.

'Well, you may never be able to defeat the true drama queen, moi, but you are a quick learner I must say. That was actually quite good.' He waited until their laugher faded away and their attention got back to him. 'But what I wanted to say is that we should plan a prank or something. Some mischief, you know. Making sure people don't forget we are the Marauders, greatest prankers of all time, masterminds at hilarious wizardry, stuff like that.' Remus sighed deeply. That didn't even come close to sleeping. They probably weren't going to sleep at all tonight.

'I still vote for taking Peters amazing advice: actually sleeping while lying in a bed.' Well, at least he tried stopping Sirius. It was obvious why Remus Lupin was in Gryffindor. Trying to go against an enthusiastic Sirius Black was useless, but brave nevertheless.

'Mooneeeeey. I can't live without pranking. Besides, I'm quite sure Peter would want us to wake him up. Prongs, you agree with me, right?' Sirius looked at James who grinned.

'Well, we are the Marauders. Pranking always comes in first place. Sleeping is not important. We never sleep when you need us, Moony. So you can't sleep right now, while we need you.' James decided and with that, the decision was made. They were going to plan a new prank and someone had to wake up Peter. Something Sirius was actually quite good at.

'I'll get the cheese fingers.' Remus closed his eyes and shook his head, having a hard time handling his defeat. Sirius for that matter jumped of the bed, making the boys shudder while hearing another alarming creak. Smart as idiotic James was, he opened all the curtains of the bed and climbed back towards his own. They didn't need to sit in one bed with four people to plan a prank. That would be unnecessary danger, especially if they destroyed Remus bed. One didn't want to upset a werewolf if it wasn't highly necessary.

'Psssst. Peter!' Sirius waved one of the cheese fingers in front of Peters face. He could see his nose wrinkle, while the scent of the cheese fingers seduced him out of his cosy dream world into the real one. A grin spread on Sirius' face. 'Wormtail, I have some tasty cheese fingers for you, my friend.' The funny thing was that Peter never woke up from sound, scents were much more effective and cheese fingers were his favourite snack. Before Sirius knew the guy he had never heard of those weird muggle cheese sticks, but Sirius had to admit they were indeed rather tasty, although he preferred those bacon snacks Remus once bought him since "he was such a dog", as Remus always proclaimed.

'Whoa, Padfoot, what's up!' Peter suddenly squealed as he woke up and noticed Sirius' face was way too close to his.

'Well, if you don't want the cheese fingers,' he calmly answered and leaned back. Immediately Peter got up and dived towards Sirius hands, but wasn't quick enough. 'Calm down, Mate. Here you go.' Peter stretched out his hands towards him and Sirius handed over the cheese fingers. Slowly Peter got up and wrinkled his nose again before looking around with tiny mousy eyes. Remus looked extremely tired, but smiled at him nevertheless. James was as energetic as ever. It wasn't hard to figure out what the Marauders were thinking.

'You guys want to plan a prank in the middle of the night?' Sirius nodded and jumped on his own bed again instead of Remus'.

'It's not like we haven't done that before. I really don't get why you and Remus are so against it,' James complained and again Sirius nodded.

'Well, maybe because we are tired and there is no reason to be in a hurry. Can't we do it tomorrow?' The sandy haired boy groaned and turned around to hide his face in his pillow. Peter bit his lip watching his three friends before shrugging his shoulders.

'Well, I am awake now. And I have cheese fingers…' He clearly wasn't as brave as Remus and didn't want to upset James or Sirius. Besides, Peter had slept for quite some time now. 'But what about Quidditch practice, Prongs?' Ah, there it was. The catch. Sirius had to admit he didn't expect it, but Peter was the sneaky one of the four guys. Not in a brilliant way, but he was better at finding short cuts, ways to evade things. That kind of stuff.

'I'll just think of that ashole Prewett. I'm quite sure the anger will give me enough adrenalin to fight an whole army.' Remus snorted inside his pillow, making a very weird and funny noise.

'You are unbelievable, Prongs. He already made up for it.'

'Not to me!' James immediately said, looking quite offended. For a few seconds everyone stared at him in silence, before bursting out in laughter. 'He is still a prat, okay. Lily deserves perfection if you ask me,' he eventually concluded.

'And you're perfection?' Sirius asked sceptically. 'Or do you want me to date her?' James' pillow hit him straight in the face, making him collapse on his bed with a loud "ugh".

'Yes, I am perfection thank you very much. Okay, no, but I would have bought her a drink. I actually bought her one! That proves I am at least a bit more perfect than Fabian Prewett. Besides, I know the difference between a Blugder and a Quaffle and my walking looks amazing.' Sirius made an effort to throw the pillow back to James, but it failed because of the incessant giggles his body produced.

'Of course, Prongs,' he finally managed to say.

'Guys, can we decide who to prank now? I would like to sleep at least one hour.' Remus seemed to be a bit more awake again and therefor interrupted them firmly. 'The Marauder meeting has been opened. Number one of our list: who to prank?'"

 _Guest reviewer that already posted two reviews_

 _Thank you so much, this is actually just to practice my English. I usually write in Dutch on another site, but it's really nice to know you like it c:_

 _Oh btw, I just wanted to say that if it takes long before I update, I'm just very busy studying. I don't do the quitting thing anymore, this story will be finished. Not sure yet when, 'cause it's going to be at least 100K, maybe even much more. I haven't planned it out yet. But I will finish this ^^_


	9. 2,4 The Marauder Tower

"An enormous list appeared in the middle of the room as soon as Remus asked the question. It was their so-called "Greenlist". First Remus wanted to call it a blacklist, since apparently that was something muggles usually did, as his mother was a muggle, but Sirius was against it, his surname being Black. Then James suggested green, since it was the colour of evil if you asked him. The colour of the killing curse, the colour of Slytherin, the colour of the eyes that made him lose his heart... Yes, the colour green was seducing, but very dangerous. Therefor they now had a Greenlist with all the persons they liked to prank. On top was Snivellus Snape of course, but another name was climbing up the ladder. Sirius crawled towards the foot of his bed and frowned as Fabian Prewetts name was moving across the parchment.

'Guess most of us really want to prank that no-drink-buying-bastard Prewett. Such a shame that's not an option right now.' Remus shook his head in disapproval. He probably thought it was wrong of the boys to judge Prewett, while Evans already forgave him, but at this point Evans was just too good for this world.

'Sirius, why am I on place seven?' James suddenly asked. He was right. The name James Prongs Potter was standing in the upper section of the list, making Sirius mutter a few curse words under his breath. It hadn't been in his plan of action James would find out he wanted to prank him before being pranked at all.

'I don't know, mate. Maybe it's about those comments in the Three Broomsticks. Here, Evans is just below you. The list must know I didn't like those comments, at all. But don't worry; I wasn't planning to prank you anytime soon. Why don't we prank that idiotic Defence Against the Dark Arts professor of ours, Crayon. He's on place four and I heard he gave an T to a first year Hufflepuff, just because he has muggles as parents and therefor asked a "stupid" question in his opinion.' Sirius knew this would guide away everyone's attention of the fact Sirius was indeed planning a prank on poor Prongs. Everyone immediately agreed on pranking Crayon. Even Remus didn't have any protest, which meant the professor definitely deserved an awful, humiliating and hilarious Marauder prank.

'Problem is, what are we gonna do to him? I really don't feel like getting caught by that bastard,' James said promptly. Though getting caught was almost never something they wanted to happen, they usually didn't really mind. It was part of being a Marauder, though it were mostly James and Sirius who got caught, since they were less careful than Remus and Peter, but none of them made a problem of it.

'We never want to get caught…' Peter mumbled before the others could start asking questions.

'I know, but I don't trust this guy. It's just... I even wonder why Dumbledore hired him. The only reason I could think of is to keep an eye on him. I talked about it with my dad and, well, he doesn't trust it as well.'

'All the more reason to prank him, though,' Remus cut in. 'If your suspicions are valid, it would mean he is a death eater or at least something related to a death eater.' Sirius couldn't agree more. Death eaters actually deserved a lot more than just pranks, a lifetime in Askaban for example. They weren't in the position to make that happen, though, at least not yet, so pranking was the best option.

'True, we need a perfect plan. Anyone has any ideas?' James was the last one to speak for quite some time. The Marauders always held these moments of silence, thinking of possible pranks. It were the only moments Sirius actually enjoyed silences.

It was Peter who was the first one to speak.

'James, what about that dancing thing you told me about a few weeks ago? That sounded funny.' Dancing thing you read about? James? Sirius didn't even know James could dance, let along he told Peter something funny related to dancing. Besides, James never read something out of free will, unless it was Quidditch or prank related or about something to help his friends. Noting about what Peter said sounded logical or even like James Potter.

'Dude, what the hell is Wormtail talking about?' James opened up his mouth and closed it again. Then he moved towards Peter and nudged him, making the poor boy squeak like a scared little pig.

'I told you not to say anything about that, Wormtail! Especially not to Sirius,' he huffed, before taking his original position on his bed, nervously fussing up his already messed up hair with his hands. 'So, I read something about some weird dance muggles invented, with idiotic moves and sounds. A bit like a cavemen. We could make him do that after hearing a specific word. Something everyone uses, but not all the time, so that every time he hears that, he goes all crazy dancing and singing.' Sirius clapped in his hands, thinking that was a great plan. It was only then he realised James still hadn't told them where he got this information about muggle dances and why he even knew something like this in the first place.

'Prongs, why in the name of Merlins fluffy Christmas sweater do you even know this?' Sirius asked after his eyes met Remus', finding out he was thinking the exact same thing. Again James messed up his hair.

'Well, I'm pretty sure you will hate me for this. I was planning to tell you when we make it to the final game against Slytherin, because… well, I got this great idea. It's the perfect strategy, only you will most definitely not like it.' Okay, that wasn't a good sign. James usually had quite normal strategies, unlike the Slytherins who just tried to kill everyone who got in their way. They always looked more like they were on a killing mission than playing Quidditch, while the Gryffindors actually played the game.

'Just get it over with please,' Sirius muttered, not sure if he wanted to know what crazy plan his best friend came up with.

'Okay, we barely won from Slytherin and we had loads of injuries after the game. They are much better than Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, so if we finally make it to the final for once, we probably have to play against Slytherin and they are going to try to hit us even harder. We need an advantage and that's when I got the idea. I figured they know nothing about muggle strategies, you know, from muggle sports.' Well, it at least started out interestingly. Sometimes Sirius wondered how James came up with these creative ideas related to Quidditch. Without James as a captain he was pretty sure they would never have beaten Slytherin.

'I found something about an Australian tradition. They have these dances inspired at cavemen people, well I'm not quite sure actually, but this weird dance was to scare and intimidate their opponents before the game. A bit like what teams sometimes do at the world cup, only then a lot less pretty and weird. I figured, since it's a muggle tradition, it could give us an advantage, since the Slytherins definitely won't know about this, those narrow minded purebloods.' Sirius mouth dropped. What a complete moran! He was insane if he thought the Gryffindor team would do this. Brilliant, wicked, but definitely insane.

'That's actually a great idea, Prongs. They'll probably never expect you to do something like that and therefor will be flabbergasted ánd confused.' Wait, did Remus just agree with this weird plan of James, even though he isn't even in the team?

'Wait, wait, wait. I am not gonna dance around like a cavemen! We can use the dance for the prank, but I am against this Quidditch strategy of yours.' He barely got the chance to finish his sentence. It seemed James practiced convincing his best mate.

'Think about it, Pads. If we confuse the Slytherin team, you can take out Wilkes before they can send him after us. When they don't have their greatest physical power, they have to win due to actual Quidditch talent and we all know they are way less talented than the Gryffindor team!' Well, he clearly thought about it a great deal of time and Sirius had to admit taking out Wilkes would be a great way to end the sixth Quidditch season at Hogwarts. Besides, Sirius always looked hot. No matter what idiotic plan he was carrying out. He wasn't going to give in just yet, though. First Prongs had to convince the others and that wasn't the most important thing on their list right now. They weren't even in the finals yet.

'Well, let's discuss that with the rest of the team. Maybe I'll give in then, but right now all I have to say is "no way". Besides, we have a prank to plan.' Peter bit his lip, looking from Sirius to James, probably wondering if the latter already forgave him. The grin on James' face said enough: the boy always knew when he had won a battle even though his opponent didn't know it yet. Sirius decided to ignore it and instead turned his head towards Remus, who was about to open his mouth and say something.

'We have indeed. Prongs, why don't you tell us a bit more about that Australian dance thing?'"

 _Well, now you know who they are going to prank and that's also the end of chapter 2. If you're wondering what this prank has to do with Jily, Harry is wondering that too c; Thanks for the reviews. Really made me smile ^^_


	10. 3,1 The Haka Wardance Prank

'What does a prank have to do with my mum falling in love with my dad?' Harry asked curiously, interrupting Sirius' story of the Haka Wardance prank. The man laughed as if it was as clear as vodka. Even Remus now understood where he was going. Problem was that Harry had no idea what kind of people his parents were and how they became a couple. Therefor a prank, something it seemed would only piss off Lily Evans, couldn't be the reason the two ended up together, but it was one of those moments that made Lily fall in love with James, even though James would never believe those kind of moments existed. He was the last one to see the struggle Lily was in, even though he was the only one who could help and understand her. Quickly Sirius stopped laughing.

'Well, actually it all makes sense, when you hear the rest of the story. Trust me. Your mum was quite cool actually, as long as we didn't bully innocent people. Professor Crayon was far from innocent and she knew that even better than we did back then.'

"Sirius thought he was going mad. They had been in the library for three hours. THREE hours! He was miserable. He wasn't sure if one could be allergic to books or die from an overdose, but he was dead anyway. At home his former father and mother had a library as well and Sirius found on a very young age that one shouldn't spend too long inside that devilish room full of books.

With tiresome eyes he looked at the mirror he got from James, when his best friend had found out what was happening inside the noble house of Black. Just to make sure he could always help him if necessary. Was the library making him look less handsome? It seemed like it. He had to get out of here. No matter what. It was all Prongs' fault anyway. If the wanker would have remembered which book he had read, or at least where they could find it. But no. They had to search the whole library to find information about that bloody Australian cave men dance thingy. Even Evans had noticed they had been there way too long, even though she tried to hide the fact she had noticed James was in the same room as her at all.

'Prongsssss,' Sirius started whining again. It was in their Marauder code they had to help each other out while pranking no matter what, but Sirius really wanted to get out of here, so he just kept trying in the hope the others would get so annoyed that they begged him to go. 'I think I'm getting wrinkles around my eyes. I'm positive the library makes one less hot. Can I go? I mean, Peter and Remus are lost cases, but what am I without my handsomeness? I don't have your Quidditch skills. My appearance is all I have!' James lifted one eyebrow, looking quite funny actually.

'Padfoot, shut up. Keep looking. It has to be here somewhere.' Why did he pick the friend who would never give in to work with again?

'Fine, then I'll just ask Evans.' Well, that at least had more effect than everything else.

'What? No! Why? We can't ask Evans. She has to think I don't like her anymore!' Sirius sighed.

'But she is a muggleborn and knows everything. She must know about that cavemen dance.' James seemed to have trouble deciding if Sirius was right or not. It wouldn't take long before he was convinced. Sirius knew his best mate far too well. He could never stay away from Evans long and they actually had a good reason to talk to her this time. 'It won't do any harm. I promise.' James shook his head and stood up. Yes, jackpot!

'Fine, but if you're wrong, I will destroy your hair.' Sirius gasped. How could anyone be that cruel?

'You're just jealous, because your hair is a mess,' he squealed, covering his head with his hands.

'Are you insane? I love my messy hair. Girls dig what. Isn't that right, Evans?' They had barely reached the red head and James was talking nonsense already. Well, if he was acting this way already, Sirius better prepared himself for air force attacks on his hair. Maybe he could buy himself an epic motorcycle helmet to protect his most precious property. An irritated moan left the red heads mouth. She wasn't amused they were bothering her. At all.

'How would I know? If you call those dumb Barbie dolls that like your hair girls, I don't I even want to be a girl.' She was sighing, looking rather tired. She definitely wasn't in the mood for Prongs' stupid behaviour and so Sirius smacked him on the back of his head.

'Mate, I believe you meant to ask her a complete different question.' The offended look disappeared from the hazel eyes and James couched, trying to save his bloody ass. He completely missed the fact Evans couldn't help herself from smiling a little, enjoying the show. Sirius needed all the strength in his body to contain himself from letting her know he did see that. They needed the red head. Provoking her wasn't the best idea at this very moment. Maybe later.

'Right. Well, since you know much about muggles and stuff, I was wondering if you happen to know about this epic Australian cavemen dance tradition. I read about it a few days ago, but I forgot where.' At first Lily frowned in a very scary "I-am-gonna-find-out-whatever-you're-planning-and-make-sure-you'll-get-punished" kind of way, but luckily then the laughing came. Sirius could only sigh in relief, but James lifted his eyebrow once again. 'What is so funny about that?'

'Australian? Well that explains why you guys have been here for hours. You searched at the wrong place. The Haka is a tradition from New Zealand.' Okay, now it was time to strangle Prongs. They had searched for Australian traditions the whole time. 'What are you planning to do with it?' Ah, there it was. The dangerous Evans that liked making them pay for the pranks they pulled. They had to watch their steps with her now. Otherwise the prank would go terribly wrong. Maybe there wouldn't even be a prank then.

'Can't tell. You have to watch the Quidditch finals if you want to find out I guess. You never know if there are spies anywhere around.' Evans didn't seem to believe him. Not even the slightest bit. Even though it was partly the truth. 'How do you even know about the dance anyway?' Ignoring the fact de red head wasn't amused being in his company; he sat down next to her. Sirius decided the table suited him better.

'My dad loves watching all kind of sports. My mom doesn't and my sister often thinks it looks disgusting, so that leaves me,' she said, while shrugging her shoulders. Well, you could say they were having a nice and decent conversation. This was actually going great, if you took into account that these were James and Lily that we were talking about. 'There isn't anyone going to get hurt? Or innocent people going to get bullied?' she asked, sounding really worried. Both boys immediately shook their heads. It was again the truth. That bloody professor was far from innocent and there was nobody going to get hurt. Sirius knew Evans would disagree with this, but she was just too good for this world sometimes. Never for James, but besides that? For everything.

'Well, if it does happen I can always give you a detention and deduct house points from Gryffindor I guess,' she eventually decided and closed the book she was reading to put away in her bag."

 _Oh my Merlin, I'm so sorry it took this long before I updated the story again. I truly hope this will never ever happen again. I had to live without writing fanfics far too long._

 _Oh and everyone who was thinking WAIT THATS NOT FROM AUSTRALIA IT'S FROM NEW ZEALAND. That was the whole point. I know my way around google and James Potter is an idiot. But he's an idiot we love 3_


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